Even if it will kill me everyday,
I guess a few years with him
Is better than a lifetime without him.
But then again, losing him
Would feel like half my lifespan
Went down the drain.
These are just some of the fears
That visit my ever so pessimistic mind
When i’m alone and I ponder the odds.
And so I pray, but what to pray?
To be with him forever and grow old together?
But everything depends on God and life itself.
If possible I’d rather it be we die together
Lest I live alone and die everyday
Knowing he’ll never come back.
It’s impossible in this life
To get everything I want and need
But I guess despite my pessimism I have hope.
May 22 2014
Note: read all bold words and phrases and it forms another poem within this poem